We’ve all been there. Beating ourselves up about things in the past, things out of our control, and the things others lay at our feet.

Let’s choose to forgive someone or something today. I am a huge holder of grudges (still am honestly but without any ill intent behind it now). I’m working on me!

I never would have imagined that forgiveness would be so freeing to my spirit and my mindset. I no longer feel consumed with hatred, anger, bad thoughts, and, any feelings at all really, towards the person or thing that held me captive. Preventing me from using the lesson and finding peace. Preventing me from living my best days. It feels good to move on from that! DO I still get angry at the person who cuts me off in traffic just to slam on their brakes immediately? HELL YES! MOVE!!!

However, while I was busy forgiving others, and also making my own apology tour for my wrongs, I neglected the most important person I’d needed to forgive and apologize to- ME.

As we’ve said many times here, YOU are the most important person in your life and we must treat ourselves as such. Forgiving yourself is crucial to moving past negative thoughts, past behaviors, and guilt. Apologizing to yourself is a way to heal your inner child. To heal any trauma you assigned to yourself and said maybe it was what you deserved. To limit the negative self talk and limitations we place on ourselves.

Take a deep, quiet, candid look in the mirror. Stand before it (make sure your phone is on DND! LOL), take a few deep breaths, Relax. Close your eyes and take another deep breath. On exhale, open your eyes. What do you see? What emotions did you feel? What thoughts entered your mind? What was your view of yourself, physically and internally? If anything felt really “heavy” then that is where you start. Start here with forgiving yourself, your choices, your past; forgive yourself for burning the toast if you’re still mad about that! Do this as often as needed (but don’t keep doing the same thing that requires forgiveness. Eventually you will see and feel a change in yourself. And YOU matter, remember?

You can then move on to apologizing to others, and then yourself. When we apologize without having first dealt with what role WE played in a disagreement it comes across vapid and empty. And is received as such. How many times have you heard, “ NO I don’t accept your apology” or “Ok, but I’m still done with you”. And if that happens you move on. Apologize into the Universe. Let it Go.

Apologizing with deep heart felt meaning and acknowledgment of your role opens the door for honest communication to take place and for your apology to be held as sincere; it may potentially salvage a relationship. While you can’t force someone to forgive you, nor accept any apology you offer, you will feel better still that you put yourself out there, You have healed YOURSELF from whatever it is and can move on.

Of course, the best apology is changed behavior, and once you begin freeing yourself, and others, this will come automatically and will lift your sprits. This also is a practice, as beings of the human kind we are prone to making mistakes, ALL of us. And some of us are just simply too hard on ourselves. Today I’m forgiving myself for letting these clothes pile up.